Hi I am the Aunt of this beautiful baby boy named Max. My sister had him on June 25, 2011. She found out that he was missing an arm from the elbow down when she was six months pregnant. Being a first time aunt I was devastated, and being a nurse and very into nutrition I blamed it on what she ate, which I now know was completely wrong. I stumbled upon this site trying to research if this same thing happens often. When I found this site I was very surprised to see the amount of people that this has affected, and the different ways.
Max is five months old and he is the joy of my life. This was so hard for me because I love him like he was my own, and hard for me knowing that my sister was having to go through this. It breaks my heart when he wants to clap his hands but only has one hand, or by him only having one hand to reach with. I don’t think this affected me as much in the beginning, because he didn’t need his other hand because he was so small. As I am seeing him grow I feel like it breaks my heart more and more every day I get to know him and love him more and every day he is getting bigger.
After reading some of the stories on this site and seeing the pictures, I’ve seen so many babies just like Max and it made it seem so much more normal, it also broke my heart to see the way this ABS has affected the lives of so many, and actually how lucky that we are, not knowing it could have been so much worse. My heart truly goes out to all with ABS and their families, and I want to say thank you for posting your stories they really helped a lot, I felt like we were all alone with this problem.
Nicole
I too was born just like Max (arm exact). I can’t tell how how important it is for you to encourage, support and expect great things for Max. I was raised with 6 brothers and sisters, me being the 2nd to the youngest. My family never treated me any different. I would have been discouraged to think that my parents were brokenhearted, you see my desire and motivation came from my surroundings from the day I was born. I played tennis, as all my family did. I grew up on a lake and like my siblings, water skiing was our weekend fun. I however, went on and took professional ski lessons preparing to Ski for Sea World Ski Team. I chose college instead. After college, I went back to Sea World to become a Pearl Diver for 6 years. I have an amazing husband, 2 beautiful daughters and a teaching career that I enjoy. I am 50 years young and wouldn’t change or trade my life and experiences. I am who I am today because of my environment during those most impressionable years of my younger life. Max is normal and he will do things differently but very normal for him. I never missed or lost anything. It’s not missed or lost if you never had it. Max will do great things no need to worry.
My Daughter was also born exactly the same way(right arm). She is now 11 and a very bright, independent young lady. Sure there were some things that took her more time than the average child to do but she did it. She is now doing her 5th grade project at school on ABS. She is hoping with will answer alot of questions that her classmates have. It was surely a shock when she was born, we had no idea about her arm until then. The ultrasound results just said “can’t find right arm due to positioning”. But when I go in and look at my ultrasound now, I can clearly see her arm. It looks exactly as it does now just bigger. You cry and then you are thankful that your child is going to be with you everyday. It could have been alot worse. I thank the lord for her everyday, she is the angel at my side. I do have to share with you about her prosthetic arm.. We took her to the Shriners Hospital for Children. They sent her to have a prosthetic am fitted. They gave her occupational therapy to learn how to use it. This didn’t cost me or my husband 1 penny. The services were paid for by the Shriners. She just got her second arm, and the next on will be electric. I can say she is so used to not having one that she prefers to not wearing it when doing certain things. But her main goal right now is to ride a bike.. Her balance is off and she is skiddish on trying to ride it.. she has tried but to wobbly. So with the prosthetic arm, that should give her the security she needs to ride. I tell her all the time that there is nothing she cannot do. Max will be fantastic, Max knows no different, he will adapt to everything and find his own way to do all the things he wants. We named my daughter Hope, how ironic… It was the name we had picked out for her before we even knew..