Hi, my name is April and I am 25 years old. My husband and I lost a child to what they are thinking is ABS on September 28, 2005. I had previously had a miscarriage about 7 years ago, so this pregnancy held more anxiety I suppose. I work in an OB-GYN office so I see all the good and bad that can happen. I had my first ultrasound at 6 weeks just to verify the pregnancy and things were normal. Then around 9 or 10 weeks I had another ultrasound due to a small amount of bleeding and anxiety.
Things went smoothly as far as the baby was concerned after that. I was miserable physically with severe back pain and headaches and fatigue. Then came Tuesday September 27, 2005…..time for my 18 week survey to tell the sex of the baby. The room was packed with my family and his when the ultrasound tech said that she needed to step out and let the doctor come in. I immediatly knew something was wrong since I work with these people. I honestly was just thinking that maybe the baby had a birth defect. When the doctor came back in he did a few scans and told us that our precious baby was not alive. He also confirmed that the baby had several birth defects. His intestines were outside of his body, he had a spinal deformity affecting mostly his left side and he had fluid on his brain. We were then given options as to how to proceed.
I chose to go ahead into the hospital and be induced and deliver. I went in on Tuesday at about 2:30pm and began being prepped for induction. They placed cytotec 3 times in order to soften my cervix for delivery. At 3:30am on Wednesday my water broke. I recieved medication due to having severe back pain. One of our midwives came in to check me at about 9:45am due to my doctor being in surgery, when I opened my legs, the baby slid right out. We opted not to see him until they had cleaned him up. It then took 3 hours to deliver my placenta.
When they brought my baby in, I was scared at first of what he was going to look like. But I guess the mother’s love kicked in and he was the most beautiful baby I had ever seen. The physical deformities that could be seen only affected his stomach area and his lower left half of his body. Otherwise he looked perfect. We chose to name him Joshua Lee and had him baptized. We will cherish the hours that we spent just my husband and I looking at him and holding and loving him.
The hospital I was in offered memory boxes, that included some photos, his hat, birth and weight card and his id bracelet. They also made a mold of his hands and gave them to to have. Leaving the hospital that night was the hardest thing I had ever done because it felt as if I was leaving my baby there alone. On Friday, the hospital called again and stated that they had made something else for us. When we got there, one of the nursing “angels” had made a mold of Joshua’s arm and hand including the details of his fingers and veins. She had written in loving memory of Joshua Lee and the date of his death. This unexpected gift was wonderful. I hope by sharing our story that this can help ease the pain of others who may face this.
JC & April
